Posted by: lifebalancerecruiting | June 22, 2009

“How to Let Go and Get On With Your Life”

How to Let Go and Get On With Your Life

 Who hasn’t been worried about the future or angry about something; letting your uncontrollable emotions get the better of you, feeling stuck, unable to let them go?  You know this is not a helpful or healthy place to be but changing it is, “easier said then done.”

 Many would like to know how to just let go of that unwanted emotion and replace it with a value that honors who they want to be, such as happy or confident.  To accomplish this shift one must first recognize what they really want. 

 If you sit on the fence and feel that the emotion you are experiencing, such as worry or anger, motivates you to action then you will continue to hold on to it.  Sometimes you are choosing to hold on, other times these emotions are choosing you and you cannot escape them. A good gauge as to whether you are choosing them or not would be to determine how much action you are taking and how comfortable you feel taking it.  The less your action and comfort the more likely you are not in choice. When you notice that you are not choosing this emotion, how do you let it go?

 Your mind is unique; the way it operates is one of a kind.  Yet, like cable TV, you have hundreds of channels and being stuck on one emotion or channel is similar to your remote control not working.  What you must do is physically either fix the remote or get up and change the channels manually until you come to the one you want to listen to.  

 To paraphrase Yogi Berra, speaking of baseball, “Life is 90% mental the other half is physical.”  I have found one way to change your emotional channel it is to physically do something.  One excersise that works for me and can be done anywhere, is to get in touch with one or more of my senses; sight, sound, touch, taste, or smell.  Then I bring myself into the moment by focusing on things such as; seeing the colors in a room, hearing the sounds on the street, touching the bark on a tree, tasting the flavors of a meal, or smelling the flowers.  Exercise, such as yoga, is another excellent way to focus in the moment. 

 Be with whatever you choose to focus on, NOW.  When you have reached being in the moment, change the channel to a favorite movie, book, or experience that honors the value you want to own.  A favorite movie of mine is, “It’s a Wonderful Life,” chock full of values such as friendship, love, family, humor….

 When you focus in the moment you will take the focus off your worry or anger.  Once in the present you then have a choice; either go back to the emotion that is bothering you or replace it with a value you would prefer to honor which, in turn, will change your emotion.  This takes practice, like building a muscle; it can take time to master. Once you do, being able to choose the channel in your mind will open up a world of possibility.

 By Barney Feinberg



  1. Well said! Thank you!! xxxxx ellen

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